new year happy, year year got fish.translate that into chinese.funny rite? funny rite?? FUNNY RITE? not funny. i can't stand that ass who thinks he's been through more shit than me just because he's serving longer than i am. yay. good for you. hope i don't spill piss all over your pants tomorrow you piece of shit. anyway, i've got something that i wish to clarify. since in america, they call it american idol, why isn't singapore idol called singaporean idol? "singaporean"'s too long a word for you bro? or should we use singacan idol instead? we've been copying their reality tv shows anyway. i've been reading my past entries recently, i realised that i was funnier last time, more carefree, more.. lame. but i truly madly deeply miss my school life alot. i wish i could retake my a levels again. no wait, i don't. two years ago, my valentine's day was a letdown. (check first few entries under nostalgia) last year, i didn't know valentine's day existed. (check entries under nostalgia, you can find nothing) this year.. wait.. when's valentine's day again? tuesday? oh.. yippee ka yay, it's a working day. oh what am i talking about, i've got no date anyway! skipadeedoodah, i don't need to worry about it anyway. but maybe i can help those 1st timers clueless on what to do with their dates on that special day when they've already burnt a REALLLLY huge hole in their pockets buying 12 roses.. (whoever thought of that must be stinking rich now, not that roses stink anyway.) or old timers who're clueless on what to do on valentine's day since they've pulled out every stunt they can think of now, and now they've run out of lighters or matchsticks to burn a hole in their pockets. ben's budget valentine's day date: 1: have a candlelit dinner at your house. if you're the old timer, you can borrow a lighter from your neighbour or somethin for your candle. *note: make sure you know how to cook, and i don't think maggi mee would work either. 2. beach picnic, just the two of us. aww... ain't that romantic, you cheapo. *note: maggi mee doesn't work here either. 3. hope it rains on valentine's day and dance with your date in the rain, whilst playing "summer rain" by belinda carlisle. 4. rent love-sick movies for the night at your nearest video ezy or cinema now, buy chips and make sure you have a really comfortable sofa and have a movie marathon. *note: maggi mee MIGHT help here. ask her first. 5. play love-sick mp3s on your computer while you slow dance with her in your room. if you can't get any mp3s, ask me. cheap rates, high quality. wahahaha.. 6. make her play treasure hunt looking for her vday present. *note: alot of time required to plan, not recommended unless you're one lucky piece of crap who has nothing to do at home and has a girlfriend. 7. borrow someone's male and female dogs so both of you can have a nice stroll together. hey it's the year of the dog right? why not have a year-of-the-dog-valentine's-day date? make sure the dogs aren't frisky with each other. i'm kind enough already, don't ask me for tips on what to get your girlfriend.. i ain't your aunt agony. eh.. maybe i should be your uncle agony hor.. KICKED ASS AT 1/30/2006 12:01:00 AM. |
ME hi, i'm ben, you can call me ben, ben tan, benjamin tan, choc god, whatever.. just don't call me suzy. i'm your not-so-average guy next door (if you really are my neighbour), otherwise i'm just your not-so-average guy. i'm fascinated with ah bengs and their ability to survive in the world right here right now. if i have the money and time and an ah beng, i'll conduct a series of tests and experiments to see how they do it. don't you wanna know too? BY GEORGE... OTHER MEs. cheap shoes!! vic paul miss phua jocheben jasmine beckie isabelle germaine joy gay ben yo. manuel mark camilia cat sophie isa rach incredible tales.. of xiaoming do you like to talk cock? blogger GREETINGS.. BUAY PAISEH AH 
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