Saturday, December 20, 2003

ok.. this is like a major comeback from like more than a month ago.. =)

i'm so sure that there'll be nobody reading this so.. yep..

hols was like.. really systematic.. train, sleep, rest, online, sleep. before i know it, the holidays are gonna end soon. what have i done that is meaningful these days? i think for once i've grown closer to my dad. which is a real miracle.. like wow..... =D hmm.. the bond between us canoeists have become stronger i guess. i really think that cjc canoeing has the least politics in the whole wide world.. all we do is train train train.. play play play.. suntec suntec suntec...

love life wise.. well.. nothing's changed.. what's the use of getting attached if you are not in total control of your life? when u still need your parents to change your diapers for you? (not actually implying it.. but u know... allowances, a shelter over your head etc.) but but but.. somehow.. somewhere within me.. i feel as if there's something empty in me.. in need of love n all sorts of emotions.. in need of the quarrels which u'd know that you'll make up after them, in need of sitting by the moonlight with your loved one n wishing that the seconds would stop ticking. yup. nothing's changed.. i'm still the same dreamy old me. guess she's still the one? i missed the times when we were real close. missed the times when we'd juz talk too much crap on the phone n getting scolded by our parents because of the HUGE phone bills.. people keep saying i should move on. move where? is moving that satisfying? *hangs in the air*

seeing most of my friends being attached has it's own ups and downs.. sometimes they would just complain n complain to me that their others think that they don't care about them.. but at other times.. i've seen the smiles on their faces which would only mean that they have just spent quality time with each other that their day just brightens up so much, nothing could ever take away that smile. i know, cuz i've experienced it before.

friends... i feel that i've got an abundance of them.. i really appreciate every single one of them, new and old.. i missed the times when we'd run out of school during lessons and have our breakfast.. our prata sessions, macdonald's sessions.. i missed the times when i'd just sit in a coffee house with someone n just crap away. there's just soooooo many friends to remember that i'm going broke this christmas.. =( that's one downside of it heh.. i'll gladly trade my cash for more of these times with my friends. but some have really exclusive memberships in their cliques. i've learnt tis yr nt to force myself to get used to the ppl in different cliques. so what if they are popular when i don't feel right just hanging out with them?

it felt like springtime, on this feburary morning
in the courtyard birds were singing your praise
i'm still recalling things u said to make me feel alright
i carried them with me today now

as i lay me down to sleep
this i pray
that you will hold me dear
though i'm far away i'd whisper your name
into the sky
and i would wake up happy

i wonder why..
i feel so high though i am not above my sorrow
heavy hearted till you called my name
and it sounds like church bells or the whistle of a train
on a summer evening i'll run to you barefoot
barely breathing

it's not too near for me
like a flower i need the rain
though it's not clear to me
every season has it's change and i'll see you
when the sun comes out again.

KICKED ASS AT 12/20/2003 11:35:00 PM.

shoutout:

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ME
hi, i'm ben, you can call me ben, ben tan, benjamin tan, choc god, whatever.. just don't call me suzy. i'm your not-so-average guy next door (if you really are my neighbour), otherwise i'm just your not-so-average guy. i'm fascinated with ah bengs and their ability to survive in the world right here right now. if i have the money and time and an ah beng, i'll conduct a series of tests and experiments to see how they do it. don't you wanna know too? BY GEORGE...

OTHER MEs.
cheap shoes!!
vic
paul
miss phua
jocheben
jasmine
beckie
isabelle
germaine
joy
gay
ben yo.
manuel
mark
camilia
cat
sophie
isa
rach
incredible tales.. of xiaoming
do you like to talk cock?
blogger

GREETINGS..







BUAY PAISEH AH


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