 i am hate. i am a master of surprise i come when you least expect me to, friend or foe. i grow in you, nuturing you, owning you. till one day, you become nothing. that's when i'll leave you, leaving my counterpart, love, to clean up your mess. the whole world knows me, but cannot see me. they think they are keeping a lookout for me, don't forget, i'm a master of surprise i break families, couples, friends, even individuals apart. i work alone. my office is in your soul. call me: 1800-stuckonyou come find me, and you'll regret it. never ever search within the depths of your soul, that's when i'll spring out, filling you from tip to toe till you disintegrate people died because of me. i love that.. HAH.. how ironic.. hate loves people to die but, one thing i am most afraid of is.. love. that's why i keep a lookout too. i'm like a nomad, moving here and there. taking opportunities. love's like a hunter, tracking me down. but i'm sharp.. otherwise there'll be no more of me left in this world. yes. i'm still alive. beware of me. --------------------------------------------------------- gosh. am i feeling too much hatred to think up of such a biography of hate? i hope not. it's there i guess, it's just that i don't notice it. i'm keeping it at bay.. finished reading eleven minutes by paulo coelho today. apart from the elaborate and explicit content, i've learnt lots about life from it.. some things are really true.. and the world is so much clearer when he cites life metaphorically. go read it. KICKED ASS AT 1/10/2004 08:03:00 PM. as usual, due to the lack of the need to look after my own things, i have lost my glasses today.. looks like i'm gonna walk around half blinded for a long time.. so.. if it seem as if i'm ignoring you when you walk pass me, i'm not. i'm juz blind. say hi to me, i'll squint a little, n i guarantee you i'll know you as if you are my long lost friend. unless you do look.. well.. unique =) training's tomorrow. will i get the same sickness again while rowing? i'm pretty sure there's something wrong with my immune system, it keeps screwing up. my nose keeps getting blocked.. but i read a rather weird article in some health mag that if you put a tennis ball under the arm that is in the direction of your blocked side of the nose, your brain will think that you are sleeping on one side of your body n will tend of open up your nose bigger to allow easy air access. watched school of rock today. that jack black ( is it him? ) guy is strangely funny.. he's the type of person i wanna be IF i grow up. living a screwed up life. having an awesome love for music. my days of keeping awake during lectures are numbered. i am back to when i was a j1 boy. constantly falling asleep during classes. waking up just to move from one class to another. life's peaceful this way. i guess so. i've lost it.. i've just lost it.. my mind, my body.. i feel as if there's nothing in me that's worth living for. might as well just lose it too. KICKED ASS AT 1/09/2004 10:47:00 PM. my blog's finally back.. screwed up system keeps.. well.. screwing up. well.. school's getting back to normal i guess. it's juz the sorta thing when u gotta get used to school again.. 2 months of holiday-ing can do wonders in making u forget all the lessons u've learnt during the past year. it's so hard to wake up early in the morning, stay awake during lessons, and taking early n cramped buses in the morning. it's been it's been abt 2 and a half years already.. y can't i move on still? y does it feel as if it was yesterday only? if only you'd read this blog.. if only you knew. if only i can do anything to get that feeling back. i'd gladly sacrifice my all juz to be with you.. those things i can get back.. but once i lost u, i've lost everything. y must you step into my life? y was i so foolish? you were there when i needed you then, where are you now? i guess you are leading a wonderful life now. it's great to see you smile i guess.. it's wonderful that you don't have much troubles. i'm happy for you. there, i've said what i've wanted to say. i've got more to say actually. i juz dun wanna open up too much on the net. things may happen. bad things. KICKED ASS AT 1/08/2004 09:17:00 PM. move on ben, move on. KICKED ASS AT 1/06/2004 07:30:00 PM. Shed a tear 'cause I'm missing you I'm still alright to smile Girl, I think about you every day now Was a time when I wasn't sure But you set my mind at ease There is no doubt you're in my heart now Said woman take it slow It'll work itself out fine All we need is just a little patience Said sugar make it slow And we'll come together fine All we need is just a little patience Patience... Sit here on the stairs 'Cause I'd rather be alone If I can't have you right now, I'll wait dear Sometimes, I get so tense But I can't speed up the time But you know, love, there's one more thing to consider Said woman take it slow Things will be just fine You and I'll just use a little patience Said sugar take the time 'Cause the lights are shining bright You and I've got what it takes to make it We won't fake it, Oh never break it 'Cause I can't take it little patience, Need a little patience, Just a little patience, Some more patience I've been walking these streets at night Just trying to get it right It's hard to see with so many around You know I don't like being stuck in a crowd And the streets don't change but baby the name I ain't got time for the game 'Cause I need you well I need you Oh, I need you I need this time.... we all need patience.. don't we? sigh.. this sucks man.. KICKED ASS AT 1/04/2004 09:11:00 PM. |
ME hi, i'm ben, you can call me ben, ben tan, benjamin tan, choc god, whatever.. just don't call me suzy. i'm your not-so-average guy next door (if you really are my neighbour), otherwise i'm just your not-so-average guy. i'm fascinated with ah bengs and their ability to survive in the world right here right now. if i have the money and time and an ah beng, i'll conduct a series of tests and experiments to see how they do it. don't you wanna know too? BY GEORGE... OTHER MEs. cheap shoes!! vic paul miss phua jocheben jasmine beckie isabelle germaine joy gay ben yo. manuel mark camilia cat sophie isa rach incredible tales.. of xiaoming do you like to talk cock? blogger GREETINGS.. BUAY PAISEH AH 
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