Saturday, June 10, 2006
whenever i think of you, i'll just tell myself to stop being silly and be happy about the things i'm having now. i could do it. i knew i could too it. but what i didn't know was that if i did it too many times, this feeling would build up and eventually overwhelm me. i thought i could do it, you know, thinking that this is but a passing phase, that it would finally be all over in no time and i'd be prancing around like a kid on sugar rush once again. but all is not lost. i've prided in myself that i've forgotten about a. already :), all but a simple action of not seeing her at all and not giving a damn about whatever happens to her. (speaking of which, i don't give 2 hoots about your birthday. was a simple memory of "ben's birthday" (which is btw the same as your brother's and 2 other people you call "friends") and a simple sms wishing me a happy birthday too much for your brain to take? call me petty and everything i don't care, you were never a friend to me to start it all off, much less a GOOD friend.) BUT I DIGRESS..
the feeling really sucks. it simply emphasises all my weaknesses and makes me think of all the things i did wrong. it makes me feel emotionally drained and physically dragged. things like these shouldn't happen to me. even if i did, i should have hide it and not being able to show it to the world. isn't this but a requirement of an adult? if i didn't do that, wouldn't i expose my vulnerablilty and eventually have it turn against me? i'm just being silly.. right?
KICKED ASS AT 6/10/2006 11:27:00 PM.
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ME
hi, i'm ben, you can call me ben, ben tan, benjamin tan, choc god, whatever.. just don't call me suzy. i'm your not-so-average guy next door (if you really are my neighbour), otherwise i'm just your not-so-average guy. i'm fascinated with ah bengs and their ability to survive in the world right here right now. if i have the money and time and an ah beng, i'll conduct a series of tests and experiments to see how they do it. don't you wanna know too? BY GEORGE...
OTHER MEs.
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