 i can't help feeling that you've found someone new. ----------------------------- i met a couple of small kids (1 chinese and 1 indian. not that i'm being racist. it really was like that. REALLY LAH.) today who can't wait to grow up, so in the end, they resorted to getting others to buy alcohol for them. so cute one of them approached me and my friend while we were shopping for stuff for bbq in ntuc, asking us if we were above eighteen. they didn't look like survey takers.. so i said yes and the convo was as follows: small chinese kid (imagine kiddy and spastic voice): can help us buy modka? me and my friend (in unison): HUH?! mocha? small chinese kid: MODka! MODka! (thinking for a while...) me: OHHH.. you mean VODka? small kids: ah ya ya ya... me: eh, but how old are you 2? small chinese kid: oh i sixteen and he seventeen, den we cannot buy yet lah. *in my mind*: YOU? sixteen and seventeen? den i must look like i'm 10 then. me: HUH.. why would you want to buy vodka at 3pm in the afternoon (kids..).. and WHY WOULD YOU DRINK IT IN THE 1ST PLACE? small indian kid (HE FINALLY SPOKE) he's so cute he looks like he has 1 straight looooonggggg eyebrow across his head: AIYA.. natural what.. (natural your head lah) and they started to walk off, thinking we wouldn't buy for them anyhow. darn.. there were a million and one ways me and my friend thought of after that to disturb them.. 1) bombard them with kaypoh adult questions: IC PLEASE, why your father or mother don't want to buy for you? you father and mother know or not? which (primary) school are you from? why you ask me and not that uncle? why you got 1 straight eyebrow across your head? so you think drinking MODka will make you look 18 lah? how you know i'm above 18? what if i'm younger than you? what if i call police? etc etc. 2) OHHHH MODka ah? can... i bring you go kopi-tiam, there got kopi seao dai. 3) you not scared that i'm michael jackson meh? 4) eh, your balls grow hair and you can pee straight then you come and look for us can? and the list goes on.. why am i so slow when it comes to these things? and i should have brought a video camera too.. dang. ---------------------------- oh well.. i'm sleepy. it's 4 am in the morning.. n i think i'll go sleep my ass off already.. to be continued tomorrow. KICKED ASS AT 8/26/2006 03:53:00 AM.
the worst week of 2006 just arrived.i have just lost my phone people.. no wait.. my phone just got STOLEN. the phone which i just bought a few weeks back. i have no idea i'd feel so handicapped without my phone and without all my contacts, it's really difficult to keep in contact anymore..luckily i'm not tammy though.. i wish that fucker who stole my phone goes home to find that he has contracted hiv, bird flu, sars, gnorrhoea, syphillis and he'd get electrocuted while trying to charge MY phone. and if he choses to sell my poor darling phone, i wish that fucker would get knocked down by a car while doing so and NOOO.. he can't die yet.. he'd just be paralysed waist up and he'd be a vegetable. THEN THERE'S JUSTICE IN THIS WORLD. the worst feeling in the world is that i got my dad extremely upset with me over this matter.. all these years i've been trying to build a better relationship with my dad and this has to happen. so on top of all of that, i wish that fucker would trip over something while walking RIGHT NOW AND FALL FLAT ON HIS FUCKING NOSE. YOU FUCKING THIEF, I HATE YOU! --------------------------- oh and i managed to find my xp cd, reformatted my computer and now am able to blog again. i wanted to blow this up and announce it to the whole world but i haven't got the mood to do that since what happened yesterday. my life's in a fucking mess now.. i feel that i'm not fit to lead in the pnw this coming youth mass, a wave of nauseating emotions has engulfed me. guilt is overpowering my will to reach out to the people there. but i can't back out now, can i? KICKED ASS AT 8/22/2006 08:38:00 PM. |
ME hi, i'm ben, you can call me ben, ben tan, benjamin tan, choc god, whatever.. just don't call me suzy. i'm your not-so-average guy next door (if you really are my neighbour), otherwise i'm just your not-so-average guy. i'm fascinated with ah bengs and their ability to survive in the world right here right now. if i have the money and time and an ah beng, i'll conduct a series of tests and experiments to see how they do it. don't you wanna know too? BY GEORGE... OTHER MEs. cheap shoes!! vic paul miss phua jocheben jasmine beckie isabelle germaine joy gay ben yo. manuel mark camilia cat sophie isa rach incredible tales.. of xiaoming do you like to talk cock? blogger GREETINGS.. BUAY PAISEH AH 
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